Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Last Post of the Day

Sorry I've posted so much today. There's been a lot going on.

Please pray for me. Tomorrow I have another doctor's appointment. They have to check my hormone levels. I'm not looking forward to it, because 1) Jonathan's not coming and I'm taking the baby 2) I'll be sitting in the waiting room with about 30 pregnant women (there are 3 doctors in the office). I've been purposely avoiding pregnant women. because frankly, they make me sad. I'm still not completely over the fact that I'm not pregnant anymore. I still hold my stomach and think I shouldn't lift. Emotionally I've been doing okay, but I'm concerned about the appointment. Today I saw two pregnant women at Target next to each other, and it was kind of upsetting.

On the other hand, I have several friends who are having children, and I couldn't be happier for them. I'm excited to see Anna and Kate soon, and hopefully I'll see Mel too. Kimberly, one of these days we'll actually meet, and when we do, our kids can play. The list goes on and on.

I guess I should be happy for the women I don't know, because each of those children will be a blessing. I just can't help but feel jealous.

3 comments:

Bethany Bassett said...

I know it will be a tough day, but maybe having to take Conlan with you will end up being a blessing in disguise. Not only will he keep you busy, but those pregnant women are all going to be feeling jealous of you, with a little one already in your arms. I hope the appointment goes well and you can take some down-time to just breathe and decompress afterward.
Love you.

Life with the Akin Clan said...

What your are feeling is perfectly normal. What your friend Bethany said is right. Conlan will hopefully keep you a bit distracted. Andrew was about Conlan's age when we lost Hannah and I am forever thankful that I had that little bundle of blessing to keep me busy. Granted he never replaced Hannah, and never will, but I could not sit around and feel depressed (for long) because he needed me. We will be praying.

Kate said...

=( I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say. =( It makes me so sad, too. My friend Tatum has lost two babies and one time at our ladies' study an older woman (who had lost a baby too) told her "it's a another kind of storing up treasure in heaven." I know that was a comfort to Tatum.