In A Bad Place

Does anyone else ever feel like you're at the end of your rope? I mean, you've had more than you can take and if something else happens, you're going to break down into a million pieces? Or maybe go on an unplanned killing spree? (I believe that's what they used to call "going postal.") Well, today is that day for me.

My insomnia has compounded horribly. Even though I slept okay last night, I woke up this morning more exhausted than the last few days, which is horrible.

Yesterday Conlan had a doctor's appointment, and he got his last shot for a while. Because of the shot, he's been acting very unlike himself for the past 24 hours. Lots of anger, lots of defiance. I'm not used to this, especially with Conlan.

We needed to get our car registered in Oklahoma, and I finally got that done today. Right as I got home and got Conlan out of the car, they called me and told me that I owed them $15 more. I had already paid over $100, but I had to go back since I wrote them a check.

Family is coming in today. Even though that's not stressful within itself, preparation for it is. As I mentioned, my mom is allergic to Oscar, and a large amount of cleaning has to be done.

I'm sick of the tiniest little situation setting me off. Anger has been coming quickly, and my husband, my son, and random strangers in front of me on the road have been getting the worst of it.

I feel like I'm spiraling deeper and deeper into a domestic pit from which I'll never be able to escape. Don't get me wrong, I love being a wife and mother. I do. But the recent burdens of everyday life have been weighing down on me. I know a lot of it is because of the sleep issue. It's not an excuse, though, and I hate to use it as one. So, in an effort to be honest, I'll leave my post at this.